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Het overbelaste zenuwstelsel van moeders: waarom we altijd ‘aan’ staan

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Michelle Dogan
Serie blogger

Het alarm gaat. Ik word wakker, en mijn lichaam staat meteen ‘aan’. Alsof er ergens diep vanbinnen een knop zit die nooit helemaal uitgaat sinds ik moeder ben. Mijn hoofd is zelden stil, en soms voelt het alsof mijn zenuwstelsel altijd op standby staat, klaar om te reageren, te zorgen, te regelen.

Lange tijd dacht ik dat dit normaal was, dat dit bij het moederschap hoorde. Ik negeerde het gevoel en ging gewoon door, zoals veel moeders doen. Totdat ik me begon af te vragen wat mijn lichaam me eigenlijk probeerde te vertellen.

Al gauw kwam ik termen tegen als een “overbelast zenuwstelsel”, een constante vecht-of-vluchtmodus en chronische overprikkeling.

Het uit zich in het niet meer kunnen ontspannen, emotionele prikkelbaarheid, uitputting, slaapproblemen, gespannen spieren, en een opgejaagd gevoel dat maar niet weggaat.

Alsof iemand precies beschreef wat ik al die tijd voelde. En ik lijk daarin niet de enige te zijn. Steeds vaker kom ik posts tegen van andere moeders die zich uitgeput, overbelast of overspannen voelen.

Waarom volgens mij zoveel moeders hier mee worstelen? We dragen constant verantwoordelijkheid, slapen zelden ononderbroken, hebben weinig echte rustmomenten, en te veel to-do’s op onze mentale lijst staan. En daarbovenop zijn er altijd de zorgen om onze kinderen. De twijfel, de angsten, en de constante drang om het goed te doen.

Toen ik het patroon eenmaal begon te begrijpen, wist ik ook dat er iets moest veranderen. Ik moest leren hoe ik mijn lichaam weer tot rust kon brengen. Dus ging ik op onderzoek uit en ontdekte ik langzaam wat mij helpt om mijn lichaam weer tot rust te brengen.

Een paar dingen die mij daarbij helpen zijn bijvoorbeeld:

Rustmomenten zonder prikkels. Even niks moeten. Soms mediteer ik, soms lig of zit ik gewoon even. Alleen. In stilte.
Buiten wandelen. Frisse lucht, soms met een zonnetje in mijn gezicht en soms gewoon even uitwaaien. Onderzoek laat zien dat tijd in de natuur stresshormonen kan verlagen.
Ademhalingsoefeningen. Diepe buikademhaling. Bewust ademhalen. Het liefste doe ik dit in combinatie met yoga oefeningen.
Bezoek aan een osteopaat. Een osteopaat kan helpen door spanning en blokkades in het lichaam te verminderen, waardoor het zenuwstelsel weer tot rust kan komen.
Gronding. Hierbij richt je je op zintuigen om zo uit je hoofd te komen.
Voeding rijk aan magnesium, omega-3 en B-vitamines ondersteunt je zenuwstelsel.
Warm water. Ik begin de dag met een glas warm water sinds ik geleerd heb dat dit je parasympathische zenuwstelsel activeert, wat ontspanning en focus bevordert.
Een warm bad of douche. Dit ontspant de spieren en laat de spanning van de dag los. Soms ga ik ook naar de sauna, en na een paar uur merk ik echt dat ik helemaal tot rust ben gekomen.
Neuriën! Deze zie je misschien niet aankomen, maar het is bewezen dat het helpt je zenuwstelsel te kalmeren. Zelf merk ik dat de trillingen en langzame ademhaling spanning loslaten en me even helemaal laten ontspannen.
Emotionele ontlading. Door gevoelens te delen laat je spanning en stress los. Het vermindert de interne druk, en het horen dat iemand je begrijpt of je situatie erkent, geeft een gevoel van veiligheid.
Dat veel moeders zich zo voelen, betekent niet dat we falen. Het laat alleen zien hoeveel we dragen, elke dag weer. En soms is loslaten precies wat ons helpt om weer op te laden.

Herken jij dit gevoel van constant ‘aan’ staan? Hoe ga jij ermee om? 🫶🏼

ziek kind naar school kind in pyjama op bed
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Hoesten, snotteren en schuldgevoel: stuur ik mijn kind wel of niet naar school?

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Michelle Dogan

Serie Blogger

    Littekens op mijn borst, kinderen op mijn schoot, woorden in mijn hoofd. Ik ben moeder van twee, overlever van borstkanker – en ik deel het echte leven: de schuldgevoelens, de liefde, de angsten én het mooie daartussen.

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    wat ik mijn zoon wil meegeven foto van zoon michelle
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    epilepsie kind aanval herkennen moeder foto van Thera
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    De blik in haar ogen die ik nooit meer wilde zien

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